This last August I left the best job I’ve ever had. I was working at Gateway Church, one of the most amazing and healthy churches on the planet, where I was part of the small group of web developers and designers responsible for maintaining dozens of websites. It was an amazing job and even though I had seasons where I struggled with giving a little too much of my time to the job I thoroughly enjoyed it up until the day I left.
God had been preparing me to leave for a couple of months. Up until that point I could never have imagined wanting to leave my position, it was satisfying in a way that no other job I’ve had was. I was doing great work, learning cutting edge techniques and serving the kingdom all in the same position. But soon after realizing that God was calling us to move to Indiana I could feel the rumblings begin. It was time to transition out of that position and into full time freelance.
I’ve been freelance before but it was very cushy. I had a full time contract with a company in California where I was making a great salary and had enough work on my plate to keep me busy for a year at any given moment. That was easy, no trust required, this was something very different. While my salary at Gateway wasn’t anything exorbitant it did pay most of our bills and it paid on time like clock work. I was quickly thrust into a position where I was living project to project and would literally come down to the last day on one project before another would come in, guaranteeing work for at least a few weeks. Still I had this overwhelming sense of confidence that as long as I kept working diligently and doing my best that God would provide. Things were great and I was enjoying the feeling of dependence on my God. And then things got a little deeper.
After a while of living out this pattern I started to trust Him a little more and I started to have new feelings which are hard to explain. I was starting to feel like not only could I trust Him to provide for us but that I also didn’t have to take projects just because they would pay the bills. I felt like I could make the choice to choose projects about which I was excited or passionate. Ever since I left Gateway I’ve wanted to focus on serving churches and other Kingdom-focused ministries and now I had confidence that I could trust God to provide even if I was only taking on the types of projects that I knew I would enjoy and truly devote myself to. It wasn’t that there was anything wrong with the other projects but I didn’t have the desire to work on those as much.
It was a very interesting transition. I had to let a client or two go and I withdrew my proposal for a project that I wasn’t too excited about. The people-pleasing part of me felt wrong, like I was making a mistake, but the faithful part of me knew that my greatest work would come from projects that I could focus on passionately. Since then I’ve stayed busy with a couple of churches and some secular projects that I really enjoy working on and I’ve had more than enough work. He is truly faithful.
My spirit tells me that all of this is about learning to truly trust God to provide, no matter what my logic tells me. Who knows, maybe one day He’ll tell me to step out into vocational ministry even though there’s no guaranteed source of income! I’m not quite there yet, but I’ll be there soon enough!
So how are you doing in terms of trusting God as your provider? I don’t believe He calls everyone to leave their job and go freelance, but are you trusting God to be your provider in spite of your steady paycheck? It’s easy to trust our employer and forget that our Great God is the one sustaining you. Praise Him today for His great provision in your life!